A Year of Disappointment

It is no secret that this year has been extremely difficult for me... as well as my little family.

* We learned that I have "unexplainable infertility".
* We had to put our poor boy, Rupert, to sleep unexpectedly. He was much too young to leave our lives.
* In July we found out that our second little miracle was not to be. I had to have a horrible procedure as the result.
* Scott got into some legal trouble.
* I found out I had a cyst that was growing on my ovary. Had to take a month's worth of torturous birth control pills to dissolve it.
* Scott had to have surgery on his ankle.
* My latest round of IUI did not work.
* My little girl, Anka, has been found to have a heart condition that has had me worried sick the past four days.
* I got an explanation of benefits from my previous insurance carrier that they aren't going to pay a dime of my bloodwork...so now I have to somehow come up with nearly $5000 to pay for it...without completely draining my savings account.

Yes, this has been a year of disappointments. But there have been a few blessings as well.

* Scott and I found hope in a group of wonderful doctors to help us become parents. Specifically Drs. Mooney and Maseelall.
* I have grown pretty close to a few coworkers.
* Scott and I were blessed to find out on June 2nd that we were expecting our second baby.
* I got to spend the major holidays with family.
* Scott and I found a church that we enjoy, now we just have to make sure we go every week.
*Scott's surgery was a success.
* The birth control pills did their job and dissolved my cyst.
* My family got to spend another year with our grandparents, and that is oretty awesome.
* Scott and I hosted a Christmas dinner for some family.
* My little Anka is a trooper and the doctor expects her to live.


While I may not understand why things happen the way they do, everything happens for a reason. I HAVE to let go and truly let God do His thing.